I wanted to focus on journaling on this layout. Something that I rarely do. I tend to ramble on. As you will soon see.
You are just two months away from being an official teenager. You are quickly transforming yourself into a young man. A few of those stereotypical traits kids your age possess have begun to surface. You yearn for independence and privacy. Your friends are beginning to take your focus from your family. You starting to question the decisions your dad and I make for you day in and day out. Yet, though all those changes. You are staying true to you. A bright, fun-loving, intelligent, person. Ever loyal to his family and close friends.
From our interactions these past few weeks, I fear that your transformation into a teenager isn’t going to be easy for either of us. But, as hard and anxious as this process may become, I have faith that you will be able to quickly transition from the amazing boy that you are , into the man you were destined to become.
The yearning to grow your wings has started to be met with a few challenges. First and foremost, is telling white lies to either get out of trouble or for no real reason at all. A bad habit that will be extinguished if you are to remain the wonderful person you have grown into. Not to mention, the unknowing disrespectful attitude. The constant eye rolling and tisking every time you don’t get your way. You are strong yet, defiant. Arguing when you feel life has become unjust. But, willing to stand your ground for what you believe in. Also, equally committed to making amends when you feel you were in the wrong. I am also impressed that you still openly express your love towards your family. A characteristic I hope you never let go of. A sign of a true man.
I, on the other hand, struggle with letting your new found wings grow. Life is not easy out there, and I want to make sure you have the skills to overcome any challenges you face. I want to give you every opportunity to make the right choices for yourself. But, am on constant guard when I see you get off track. I am trying to give you enough space to work through your challenges on your own. But, sometimes fearful that you may stumble in the same pitfalls your dad and I did when we where your age. For so long, we have held your hand so tightly, constant protecting you and encouraging your growth. Now, it’s counterintuitive to let go.
Intellectually I know you are smart, and astute at making decisions for yourself, but I struggle emotionally to let you fail when your decisions are based upon what you want to do, vs. what is right for you. So often, we have come to your rescue before you have made a bad decision. But, now the time has come where you must learn the hard way. You must make your own mistakes. And you must accept the consequences associated with them. Please know they may seem harsh for now. But, in time you will understand they are made out of love for you.
Through patience and faith, you and I will come through this journey strong, healthy, happy, and very proud with whom you turn out to be.
Grow Your Wings.